what is my relationship with Alcohol? I use to consider myself a 2 beers a night person (however those 2 beers were usually the tall can variety and some sort of micro brew/local that would most of the time contain upwards of 6% alcohol). I never considered myself a person who had an issue with alcohol (I was in control!…………right?). I pride(d) myself on having a healthy relationship with alcohol so that my daughter could see that it doesn’t have to be a big deal having a drink…….or not having a drink. This sounds good, but the truth is, there became more times than not that I was having a drink. There was the at least once a month (most likely 2x a month in the warm months) that I would have upwards of 6+ pints and the following days were becoming very difficult to deal with. I would have a migraine and be out of commission for at least the next day. What the hell good is that?……..as Frank Costanza said……”There has got to be a better way?!!!!!”
I started reading “The easy way to control alcohol” by Allen Carr. I was very specific in getting this book because I was not looking to stop drinking I just didn’t want the run away nights anymore because the next days after those 6 pint nights were hell for me and I wanted nothing to do with them. BUT…….I still wanted the 2 pints at the end of the day. The afternoon beers in a coffee thermos so that drinking a beer in the park while watching our little girls was acceptable. I still wanted to bbq and enjoy a beer.
Something changed….I don’t know what, but something has changed. Because I didn’t consider myself a problem drinker, I didn’t feel I was in dire straits while reading the book so I allowed myself to continue drinking. In fact Carr himself says that it is important to not abstain from drinking but to condition your subconscious brain so that I become a non drinker……..I was skeptical as fuck! but here I am after about 6 weeks of reading that book and “The naked mind” by Annie Grace (which I think is just as important In conditioning my brain). I just passed through the xmas season with very few “SIPS” of alcohol and I do not have a craving for more. I have been socially having a drink (trying to at least) with friends and I have only been getting through about 1/3 of a beer. The weirdest part for me is trying to figure out how to be socially accepting of not drinking and enjoy the social interactions just as much. I can’t believe Im not looking forward to Baileys and coffee anymore…I can’t believe I have a fridge full of microbrews…..GOOD BEERS! that I do not want to consume.
I don’t know what the future holds but Im accepting of whatever is coming and the best part is, I’m not abstaining. I just don’t want it!